Note: I wrote this in the beginning of January, but never posted it. Since several of these things have occurred, however, I am posting it now. I am obviously very psychic and you should be paying me $3.95 for every minute you read this blog. The ones I’ve italicized have already happened.

1. Someone will win the presidential election in the U.S., and some people will not be happy with the outcome. People on TV will bitch and argue.
2. Britney Spears will do something cuh-razy! (Happened!)
3. Some viral video will circulate the Internet. It may or may not involve poo.
4. Global warming will continue to impact life. People will be vaguely concerned but still blast their A/C on the really hot days and not get the connection.
5. I will get drunk on a single bottle of beer and do something stupid. (Obviously!)
   
6. There will be some really bad weather. (Yesterday! And in my city, too.)
7. A celebrity will die. (Yep and yep.)
   
8. A celebrity couple will break up. (At least one couple has.)
9. Kids will find a new style to be excited about. Lots of people who have not finished puberty will dress in said style, and all will claim to be completely original and individual.

Montel Williams totally needs to book me.